Monday 17 January 2022

Managing Regret

I just finished reading The Midnight Library by Matt Haig and if you've read it you'll understand that it's all about regret, how to manage it and move past it.

Naturally, thoughts turn to my own regrets of which there are many, some big, some small. Regret is a funny thing. What I view as a regret may, to other people seem like such an inconsequential thing. Whilst when people ask me - do you regret xxx, I look at them with a confused look on my face. Of course I don't.

Regret has so much to do with where you were in your life at that time and the extenuating circumstances that surrounded the event in question. 

The real question is what you do with the regret you've made over the events that mattered to you.

Do you let that regret turn bitter, become angry, make you lash out at the perceived wrongs that are happening to you?

Do you perhaps allow your regret to bury you, suffocate your happiness and extinguish your desire to live?

Maybe you let your regret light a fire within you to be better.

Or perhaps you can just let go of your regret and move on with your life.

I fear I am perhaps a wallower. And spend a lot of time doing nothing to get over my regret. That said, this year both me and the hubster decided that we needed to get off our butts and actually start saying yes to things. Get back out there.

The pandemic has had a huge impact on our desire to be social, our willingness to take a trip and go visit people and/or places. We have slipped so far back in our comfort zones that we can barely see the door anymore. 

So far this year I've said yes to a sleepover at a friends house with my kids - something I would never had done - and today, a last-minute excursion to The British Museum which has completely emptied my purse but I don't regret seeing the excitement on the kids faces at being out and about on an adventure. Hopefully more to come. 

And perhaps one day I will be able to say, I regret nothing! 


Claire Buss is a multi-genre author and poet, completely addicted to cake. Find out more about her books on her website clairebuss.co.uk. Join the discussion in her Facebook group Buss's Book Stop. Never miss out on future posts by following me

2 comments:

  1. This is brilliant, Claire. I have Matt Haig's book on audible and you have wetted my appetite for it further. Yes, I think I'm a wallower too and find it hard to let go of past disappointments, even present ones, like my son getting married without his family next month. But we have to move on and not let these things swamp us. In that particular case, to look forward to the celebration following despite the disappointment. Look up and forward.

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    1. Aww thanks Sheila. I hope you enjoy the book when you listen to it. I like that - look up and forward. Keep going!

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